I've been playing online poker for about a year now. Last night my girlfriend told me it's either poker or her.
I think she's bluffing.
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Just my luck -- judging by the itching and the rash, I think I'm allergic to prostitutes.
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It's been six years since my granddad died and we're still paying for his funeral.
I knew we shouldn't have buried him in a rented suit.
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I'm all for sexual equality. That's why I allow my female staff to work longer so they can earn the same as the men.
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They say what you don't know can't hurt you.
Not strictly true when it comes to bomb defusal.