Mickey and Minnie Mouse are at a divorce court.
Lawyer: So Mickey, it says you want to divorce Minnie because she's....extremely silly?
Mickey: No, I said she was fucking Goofy!
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A young Greek couple are about to get married and before the nuptials, the young woman's mother pulls her aside for a quick chat.
"Now you're about to be married," begins the mother, "...and Greek men are known to prefer sex in a very specific way so at some point, he may ask you to ‘turn around'. I want you to know that it's ok to say no if you don't want to do it that way."
The wedding day comes & goes and there's no ‘turn around' request from her new husband. No request on the honeymoon nor through their first year. No special request for their 1st anniversary, or their 2nd.
Halfway through their 3rd year, her husband says "You know....if you want, you can turn around and we can try this a different way".
The woman says "No no no! My mother warned me that this day might come and she told me I never have to do that if I don't want to!"
The husband replies "That's fine with me... but I thought you wanted kids one day".
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The Romans were never great inventors, but were especially talented at improving things they got from the Greeks.
For example, the Greeks may have invented the three-way but the romans really improved it by including women.
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One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm.
The wife turns over and says: "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynaecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh."
The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again.
This time he whispers in her ear: "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow, too?"
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Three generations of prostitutes are sitting around a table.
The youngest starts complaining, "Can you believe it? It's twenty dollars for a blowjob, I'm getting robbed."
Her Mother looks at her and says: "Bitch! When i was giving head, it was five dollars!"
Granny, who's sitting there rattling her tea cup, says: "Well, during the Depression, we were just happy to have something warm in our belly."