Oh, the fun

Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church...
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.


I got so drunk last night, I don't know if I found some keys or lost a car.


My boss has blocked all pornography sites from the work computers.

So now I have to wank over the picture of his wife and kids on his desk.


"One mans trash is another mans treasure," I told my son.
He just stared at me blankly.
"What I'm trying to say is: you're adopted."

Blah, blah, blah