29 Jul 2017 | KterinK

It’s so funny

I hope the guy who invented Auto correct burns in hello!!

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My mate walked into the pub last night with a massive black eye. "How did you get that?" i asked. He replied. "I was banging my neighbours wife over her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said 'it's my husband! Quick, use the back door'...

Thinking about it, i should have run, but you don't get offers like that every day!"

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I just passed a drugs test at work.

Although I am happy to have kept my job, I'll be having words with my dealer.

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My mates call me gay because I can't stay on a skateboard for longer than a minute.

I'd like to see them try it with high heels on.

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I was watching porn last night when my mum walked in.

Not the best way to find out what she does for a living.

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My wife said she didn't need me anymore.

So I sneaked into the kitchen and tightened all the lids.